On a journey to rediscover myself

Over the last so many years I have become very vigilent over my feelings, how I express them, what I speak, how I speak and most importantly am I expressing too much. 

People often say it's lonely at the top - No doubt it's true. Over the last half a decade I have spent more time being alone in my workstation or cabin, buried with work. Not like I haven't balanced work life, but I surely missed out on making any new friends, socially. Because of the simple fact when you are creating a foundation for something spectacular you have to slog and these are some of the sacrifices one needs to make. 

Anyways moving on, when I look back at my journey of last 5 years I feel it's like a Mirage of deception. A deception I built for myself that I need to be like this, need to behave like this and so on. 

(March 2019 early days of setting up the new factory location) 

More than deception I would call it a deceit a self deceit. I have always enjoyed having interesting conversations all my life, and I have had the talent to strike a conversation with any person on any topic. People who have known me during my academic days today don't recognize me (also due to the fact that I don't look smart and handsome anymore) I have had that aura of charismatic leader, who was highly extrovert in nature, never said no for anything, always eager to try on new things, challenges and full of life. Today I have become exactly the opposite. I really don't know whom to blame, in my head till recent years I was still the same college kid smart and handsome till I started noticing my own pictures and realized I look no where near to what I was 10 years ago, people who gave known me in the recent years when they look at my pictures or videos don't even recognize it's the same person. Why this stark range has happened in my life I wonder.

(somewhere in 2008 Singhagad Fort Hikking with friends) 

I have started to realize that in my quest to become a corporate buffoon, I have systematically killed the real me. I have lost touch with my own self. Talents that distinguished me from the crowd, today is replaced with habits and characteristics which I am not proud of. 

The guy who would spend hours doing self analysis without touching cell phone and physically writing notes, pages of day dreams is now busy watching YouTube vlogs, listening to podcasts, Netflix n chill. I never took time off to chill in my previous life, I was always on move to explore more, like what else can I learn, how can I just wander on new roads till I find something interesting, take random pics of sunset. And today I slip into the quilt, switch on my AC and watch something interesting that takes my mind off from the stress I have in life. That's not me, a part of me is crying deep inside. 

But I guess life is all about giving a second chance, sometimes a self realization is also good. And in this age of social media I avoid posting my inner thoughts, like my true self with no filter attached. Gone are the days when you could express your true feelings on social media - remember the early days of Facebook where you felt like describing "How are you feeling" in its true sense. And even tagging your friends and enter a long array of chats with friends. Today you can't share a story of feeling low or feeling alone on WhatsApp with a fear that everyone will see this. From my employees, to my vendors, buyers and even my maid... And everyone will judge me... So much to think about. Not a page on social media is left where you can express your true feelings. And just yesterday I got bumped into this very page when I shared it with few new friends I made. And I was like oh yes no one reads blogs anymore this is the safest and the best place to simply express my deep rooted feelings. 

After all I always expressed my true feelings here on this blog. It's just that I may be going through a mid life crisis when you are not sure what is happening in your life and you are trying to be cool. So this is me in my true self expressing myself. And waiting to see the new ne emerge soon. 

Miss being an author

I don't even remember the last time I logged on to this blog site. In this era of the internet; we often visit many sites, register ourselves and then later abandon them like those old toys we once played with in childhood and later found something more interesting to dwell upon. And one day you find that old toy lying in some trunk in the corner of your house; looking at the toy the memories do flashback but you are too old to play with it now.

Something similar happened today; being a Saturday I decided to take a little break and work from home instead of being in the office whole day. Thus in the second half of the day, I drove back home had my bite of lunch a little late than usual. After spending a good few hours on the excel sheets and crunching the numbers my saturation point had reached. While browsing for some good choiec of music I went to search for internet radio sites. I still remember those good old days; back when I was in College when Yahoo Messenger used to be cool and Launchcast Radio was buzzing. Those memories bring back what Gaana.com fails to do even today. So I selected some random station and out of nowhere, I landed on this blog site that I once used to be glued to wondering what next to write. I was amazed to see my draft section with over 29 unpublished stories all dating back to 2012-14. After previewing a few I realized that there was something in me back then that inspired me to write. Most of the stories stuck at a point where it seems there was a dead road ahead.

When I ask myself, why did I stop writing, I have absolutely no idea what inspired me in the first place. I really miss being an author of amazing stories, poems, songs that I used to write. There was a time when I used to express myself so well with words. It was like I could express everything I had in my mind in beautiful words, however, I am still hoping to break the ice; after so many years of dead writing.

I don't even care if anyone reads this or not nor will I even share the link like I used to do in earlier days promoting my stories and sharing the links with friends and family. I really wish to share inspiring stories, motivational stories, just a general day to day affairs, and more importantly my thoughts.

Hoping to come back soon with something new may be a poetry or a song! Song reminds me my guitar's E string broke some 3-4 years ago and forget changing it; I don't even recollect where have I dumped the guitar! All I can remember is that it may be in the loft of one of my offices.

There is so much to repair, more importantly getting back to my life from this corporate zombie! I need to chillax like old days! At least I felt alive back then!

What's wrong with Dr. Manmohan Singh - The Prime Minister of India???

For the past many years, Indians have wondered why Manmohan Singh does not speak up despite being the recipient of several disdainful words such as spineless, toothless and weak. He sits in Parliament with no expression on his face. It appears that even if you just replace him with his wax statue, no parliamentarian will notice the difference. Besides, he never makes an impromptu statement despite being a scholar; he just reads out prepared and calibrated speeches. Shameful, utterly disgraceful. So, why does Manmohan Singh not talk? And why does he take so much crap from his detractors. Why does the prime minister always behave as if he were born without a spine? Let’s look at Manmohan Singh’s handwriting, which might give us some insight into his personality.

Handwriting and signature size: In March 2011, Prime Minister Manmohan Singh visited the Embassy of Japan (http://www.in.emb-japan.go.jp/Press_Releases_Embassy/PR13-2011.html) in New Delhi to sign the book of condolence for Japan earthquake victims. Notice the equal size of his handwriting and signature. Both of them are small. This size of handwriting and signature is not for leaders. People with such small handwriting can never lead people. They are so lost in themselves that they cannot think about reaching out to others or bother about finding ways to connect with the people. Clearly, this kind of handwriting makes him a good professor, not a worthy statesman.

In handwriting analysis, consistent disconnection between letters is indicative of lack of spontaneity, among other things. In Manmohan Singh’s case, the trait is seen in his inability to make impromptu statements and speak his mind.

Manmohan Singh’s handwriting shows that he will continue to be a failure as a head of the state. There is nothing in his personality that could even remotely suggest that he is suitable to occupy a post that intrinsically requires the occupant to be in touch with the people. That is why despite having got such a high position on a platter, Manmohan Singh has not been able to adapt his personality to the requirements of the new role. Not even in 9 years! And the bad news is: he can never do that. Therefore, quit, Mr Singh. By abdicating, you might do the country good.

To get your handwriting analyzed - visit http://www.knowthyself.in/or follow us on http://www.facebook.com/knowthyselfindia

She's a Weirdo - Part 8

"Why you don't like romantic songs kya?" asked Vinit when Sid asked him to change the genre of the songs he was playing on his guitar. "Nothing as such, bus aaj mood nahi hai." said Sid throwing the remains of his cig butt out of the window. "But yaar, mera toh bahot mood hai!" said Vinit and started blushing. "Woha!" what was that some one's blushing Vinit don't tell me you found someone?" asked Sid making Vinit's face flush out with redness. "Looks like that to me" said Vinit Candidly and keeping his guitar back in its case. "Bhai this calls for details. At least tell me her name, is she from the college itself?" went on Sid. "Well, her name is Maya and yes she's from our college and you know which course" winked Vinit looking at Sid. "Biotech Batch" echoed both of them. "Toh Maya ki moh maya ka shikar hua Vinit Verma" said Sid sitting crossed legged on his bed like a baba giving a pravachan about Moh Maya while Vinit simply leaned back on his bed taking support of the wall. "So, what's the scene are you guys like going out on a date or something?" enquired Sid. "I don't know yaar, she's really cute and sweet. But I guess she doesn't wants to go out with me alone." said Vinit with a little pain. "Why so buddy? That doesn't looks cool to m! What's her plan" Sid asked Vinit. "Well according to her, she made a pact with her friend that they would be going on a double date, so where will I find some one decent enough I could take with me on a date who doesn't blows off my date and yet behave with the other girl. I think I'll pass." saying so Vinit lied down on his bed. "Yeah man you are right! Pure hostel mein you won't find a single guy who is not a tharki." saying so Sid started removing his Tee to change into something which is fresh with no alcohol smell in it. "Wait a min!" saying so Vinit stood up from the bed in one go as if someone pressed the eject button on his bed. "You!!!" Vinit pointed finger at Sid. "Yeah me??? What did I do?" asked Sid clueless what is Vinit talking about. "Sid you are my best buddy man! You can surely make a good impression on friends and girls especially, you are a decent guy else wouldn't you have had a girl friend by now" saying so Vinit got up from his bed. "Wo ho! Wait a minute, I ain't going on a blind date for you. Who knows her friend might be a fat ugly version of Ugly Betty. I don't even know her name." said Sid ridiculing the entire idea of double date. "Chal na yaar, please!" saying so Vinit came closer to Sid. "No yaar, please!" saying so Sid pushed Vinit in a friendly way. "Dekh bhai, then soon I will start playing all Dev Das songs every day and trust me it will get on your nerves to have a Dev Das in the room." said Vinit little dramatically. "Yaar, I don't even know how does Maya look like. And again why would I do it for you man." said Sid trying hard to convince Vinit of not getting him turned in for this date plan. "Uska tension mat le, yeh dekh! We clicked few snaps today in the library together." saying so he showed the candid snaps of them together. "Not Bad, Vinit! I am impressed with the your choice of girl" said Sid keeping his hands on Vinit's shoulder. "Then brother, you are in! I will just call her and inform that we are in for tomorrow!" saying so he just jumped back to his bed and called her up and started cuddling his pillow lost in the sleep.

While Sid changed into his tee and shorts and lit another cigg he had some change of thoughts this time. Let's see if this friend of Maya finds me as a stalker or not. I hope she better be good looking than Ms. Einstein. "What the hell yaar" said Sid to himself why am I getting her thoughts in my head - she's not my kind of girl, not even my type! She has insulted me so much - besides she's just a weirdo! No match for Siddharth!!

"It's done, we are meeting tomorrow night at 8 at Fire and Ice." said Vinit spreading his hands in the air as a big sign of relief as Maya would surely have been really happy because of him. "We will have to tip off Babulal so that he lets us in late in the night" said Sid. "Don't worry about that, I will take care of it, you just be back in time from your movie." said Vinit wearing his slippers as he prepared to go for a stroll in the hostel. "Movie! Wat Movie?" It's Saturday tomorrow?" asked Sid holding his head. "Yup, with no word from you Lijjo already booked 2 tickets for him and you for tomorrow's noon show - I guess he wanted a company to assist him with the subtitles." winked Vinit as he walked out of the room. Sid looked at Lijjo who was deep asleep. "Bastard! I wonder which movie is he taking me for! Hey Vinit wait for me lets go for dinner!" saying so Sid too headed out.

Neither Sid nor Roxane had any clue how things are going to unfold in the coming 2 days! This weekend is going to be really exciting keep reading!

She's a Weirdo - Part 7

"Sid!!! What the hell are you doing here outside my building? And what the hell is this guy doing here??? Don't you guys have any manners???" Asked Roxane in disgust. "Take it easy Ms Einstein, and please come over here I want to talk to you in private." said Sid and signalled Roxane to move little away from Lijjo. In the mean time Lijjo had finished his long pee session and walked a safe distance away from his water bank he had created near the tree. "What! Tell me fast" said Roxane. "Look he is my roommate Lijjo, and he went through a terrible break up  lately with his girl friend back in the States." explained Sid to Roxane in the mean time trying to take away the stick from her hand but she resisted. "You smell of alcohol, are you both drunk?" She asked. "Well, I won't deny that, yes we are drunk, but I am very much in my senses, look the poor guy!" said Sid looking at Lijjo as Roxane too looked at him with her eye brows raised; while Lijjo unaware of what's cooking up between the two looked terrified as he could still see the stick in her hands. "He was so terrified and broken with the news that he took me along with him to the bar nearby, else you tell me who would want to drink in the afternoon!" continued Sid. "I just wanted to give him company, I can't risk his safety as even he is new to India. So I too had few drinks." said Sid and exhaled. "Hope you are not a stalker of all the buildings you just got my building to come sit here and pee right here! Who gave him to the right to pee on the roads?" enquired Roxane. "Well firstly Ms. Einstein I had absolutely no clue where you stay and I have no interest in following you. I agree my friend shouldn't have done something of this sort but it's his first time and you have already scared the hell out of him with this stick you been carrying around and calling him a PIG" saying so Sid sntached the stick from her hand. "Give this to me, it doesn't suits in your hand" and walked towards the watchman and gave it to him. "Yeh lo bhaiya, aur isko madam se dur rakhna" and winked at the watchman. "So what suits in my hand?" asked Roxane. "Test tubes, ms Bio tech" said Sid and winked at her. "Whatever, I hope you were not stalking me" she confirmed again. "Look Roxane, I don't understand why don't get the point! If you feel I am not worth your friendship don't meet me again" saying so Sid walked over to Lijjo without even turning back to look at Roxane. 

"Bro, you knew that girl?" enquired Lijjo as Sid approached him. "Yeah, I just met her a couple of days ago in Library, another Bio-tech chic" said Sid and ran his hands over his pockets. "Lets head over to Anna and have some tea." said Sid as they headed back to college. "But yaar, how dare she called me a PIG! And was she really gona hit me with the stick? Man Sid, you are a savior that bitch was really a psycho!" saying that Lijjo started walking really fast. "Tu thik toh hai na? Tera nasha pura utar gaya lagta hai?" asked Sid smilingly. "Balls to her man, spoilt my complete winning mood!" Said Lijjo lighting up his ciggi and handing over one to Sid. "But what did you told her? And what were you guys discussing?" enquired Lijjo still puzzled how Sid saved him from that terrible scenario. "Bhai, a true magician never reveals his secrets! I got you saved that's more important" said Sid sipping his tea. "Woha! Matlab you gave her some gyaan, you asshole must have for sure made me look a complete c**tiya and yourself a hero!" said Lijjo exhaling his smoke. "Well not exactly, I just told her that you are heart broken so that you could win some sympathy votes from other bio tech girls" said Sid taking a puff. "Asshole, you are one! So who's going to be your date for the freshers party?" asked Lijjo. "Not sure man, will have to do some hunting pretty soon" said Sid. 

And they both went back to their rooms luckily Pratik Bhai wasn't in the room. Vinit was as usual tuning his guitar. He was in a romantic mood tonight, so was just playing the famous tune of the song Dil Ko Tumse Pyaar Hua again and again. While Lijjo settled on the bed and felt fast asleep. Sid sat over his bed looking out from the window and lit up another cigg, as the song played in the background his thoughts wandered in the lanes back to Roxane's building and he could see her furious face in front of his open eyes. However rather then just getting upset with the entire drama he created he was still certain may be she's the right girl for me. Not sure how their next encounter will unfold he was lost in her eyes and those 3 hair in front of her face that he witnessed the time he met her in the canteen. There's something about her, is it the alcohol, the guitar or just me that's making me feel this way wondered Sid and smiled candidly. "Bhai, kaun he woh? Jiske khayalon mein kho gaya tu?" Asked Vinit. "Koi nahi yaar, kuch aur suna, kya romantic gaane baja raha hai" said Sid. 

She's a Weirdo - Part 6

How can she just leave me alone at Monginis like that... what was she thinking? After all she was the one who asked me to join her at the first place. All these thoughts were echoing in Sid's head as he walked towards the Monginis. And how can she tag me as a Despo! And what's with her about cleaning the rooms and washing the clothes, like I never wash my clothes! And with this thought Sid examined his jean - I guess I should wash my clothes for a change! But where does she really stays? Thinking this he started walking towards the few lanes around the campus. This isn't going work like this! She would never tell me where she stays unless I find it out myself. It would not be cool to ask anyone in the Boy's hostel about it at this time. Satisfied with his inner thoughts Sid went back to his room only to discover that everyone was partying without him. "WTF Guys, you should have atleast called me!" said Sid as he tried to reach to his bed with everyone sitting in every place available in the room. "Guys, I have invented a new game, it's a new version of Teen Patti!" said Pratik Bhai. "Yeah, right so that everyone can lose their money to you and even if they win you would anyway take it from them with the coercive force" said Sid changing his Tee. "Oye Sale Sid, tu toh bol hi mat, kidhar gayab ho gaya tha tu... londiyon ke peeche peeche ghumta rehta hai" said Pratik Bhai as he stood up from his hot seat. "Mobile Phone naam ka ek yantra hota hai jiske dyara aap mujhe call kar sakte the" said Sid applying some deo winking at Lijjo. "Abe main sirf vasooli karne ki liye call karta hun! Acha now listen up, this is a new game and I am sure you guys will love this! But there is just one simple rule to play this game we have to finish up these khamba's" announced Pratik Bhai.

Soon everyone in the room was all in for the game after all no one gets free booze on the house! By the time it was  5 pm everyone in the room was high, plastic glasses were scattered in the room, with temporary ashtray's of mild packets lying all over the room. "Now here's what you need to do, rather than drawing three cards like we do in Teen patti, each one of you will draw only one card and hold it on your forehead revealing the card to the rest of the people..." said Pratik Bhai and Lijjo intervened in between "But Pratik Bhai, how...". " Abe mote!!! Rukh, let me complete, we all play blind, as we cannot see our own card but rest of the cards held by everyone hoping apna card mast hai" said Pratik bhai winking at Sid. Sid knew what Pratik bhai had in mind, he wanted Sid to secretly help him as he ensured Sid din't had much of liquor. But Sid was wondering how can he help him in this situation. "Sid, Come help me find the cards in my shelf." saying that Pratik bhai dragged Sid out of the room. "Look brother, if you see anyone's card higher than me, just start smiling, okay!" commanded Pratik to Sid. Lijjo started the first round with bets starting off from Rs 1 it was weird as no one could see their card. Sid on the other end was enjoying the entire show, under the influence of alcohol he started smiling very often giving all wrong signals to Pratik Bhai making him loose over and over again. By the end of 8th round, Lijjo had won over 230 bucks that's when Pratik Bhai raised the bets to Rs 100 and called Lijjo to Show. All hell break when Pratik Bhai lost. He kicked everyone out of the room and Sid and Lijjo too ran out.

"God, terrific game" Said Lijjo "Today is my lucky day". Sid and Lijjo started walking over on the streets, while it was difficult for Lijjo to walk as he was really high. After walking for a couple of lanes they both sat near a tree. "Yaar Lijjo I need a favor from you" said Sid looking at the ground. "Yeah meri jaan, anything for you" came a voice from a little distance. "Dude there is this girl I think I would like to take to the PROM but..." before Sid could finish "What! You finally found a girl" said Lijjo turning towards Sid and as he turned around Sid felt something really strange, as water splashing sound and a foul smell. "WTF man, what the hell are you doing, how can you pee here on the street" screamed Sid. "What man, it's the first time I am peeing in public place ever since I came back from the states, its so much peace to do it in open air" said Lijjo still relieving his huge bladder vessel. "What the hell you think you are doing you PIG" came a voice from a distance, as Sid turned around it was Roxane standing near the gate of the building they were seating outside. As Roxane came forward she grabbed the stick of the watchman as if she is going to hit Lijjo. "Wtf Sid, help me!" cried Lijjo unable to understand what's going on.

As for Sid, the girl he had been thinking of since afternoon and the quest of finding her apartment which had made him talk to his pal Lijjo was barging right towards his friend with a stick. He just din't knew what to do. "Now its definetly not the time to ask her for PROM" said Sid to himself.  "What the hell is going on here?" asked Roxane looking in disgust and then she saw SID....

She's a Weirdo - Part 5

Sid was smitten away by the way she licked her face for the cream. Although he felt really weird how his girl was acting... because somewhere he thought he would have got an opportunity to wipe out the cream from her face using a napkin himself. As his day dream was shattered in a fraction when she said why waste paper! Sid knew it well enough its a long way to get ask her out as his date for the PROM...Before he could say anything further Roxane got up from the chair and started walking out of the shop, he too followed her with the pastry in his hands. "Where are you following me Sid?" she asked him with her eye brows raised. "I was just throwing off my paper plate in the bin, you have a pastry to finish; you sit andar aramse and finish it" she said without letting him utter a word. "Won't you be giving me any company?" he asked puzzled. "Sorry Dude, I have alot of work to do today, wash my clothes, clean my room, and also take a sweet nap as I was awake till 4 am last night" she said smiling at him. "Are you sure this is it? Aren't you forgetting something?" Sid asked her with a straight face. "What?" she asked him puzzled. "Your assignments!!! I am sure you have alot to study too Ms Einstein" Sid told to her enjoying his last spoonful of pastry. "Oh yeah you are so right! Ciao!" said Roxane with a fake smile and walked straight to her apartment which was just few lanes away from the campus. Sid was kind of disgusted with this behavior of Roxane. He simply tossed the left over plastic case of the pastry from a distance in the bin kept outside the store and walked back to the katta hoping to find Lijjo still there.

"Thank God you are still here!" said Sid and pulled the broken chair for himself at Anna's. "What are you upto man?" asked Sid to Lijjo who was looking the campus gate. "Are Chotu, 2 cutting dena fata fat aur 1 milds." Sid said then looked at his pal and screamed "Lijjo, Buddy!" and started waving his hands in front of Lijjo! Still there was no response. In the mean time Chotu brought the tea, so Sid took one of the tea glass and brought it near Lijjo's fingers and pulled up the glass so that his fingers got submerged in the hot glass of tea! "Bhenc***D!!! Sale Sid Harami!" yelled Lijjo screaming at the top of his voice, that even Babulal the watchman at the campus gate stood from up from his chair to see what's going on. "You asshole what you think you are upto man, you ...." before Lijjo could continue Sid signaled him with this hands to stop still holding his stomach laughing at the epic scene. That's when Pratik Bhai too walked in "Kya re mote! Kyu chila raha hai?" Pratik just stood there and within few minutes Chotu got him the tea and Anna himself stepped out to give him a packet of Milds. "Kya Anna kaisa hai? Mere Khate mein likh lena" Pratik bhai commanded Anna. "Pratik Bhai, Lijjo was lost looking at the campus gate, mujhe lagta hai Lijjo ko Babulal se LUV ho gaya hai!" Sid said still controlling his laughter. "Chup baith Sid yaar!" Said Lijjo rubbishing, "I was narrowing down the beauties walking out from the campus gate for my choice of PROM." Said Lijjo smiling as if he found his match. "Abe rehne de mote! Teri size dekh ke tere saath chalne wali yaha koi nahi hai! Aur agar tujhe koi mil bhi gayi toh, dinner ke baad usko bhagwaan hi bachae!" Said Pratik Bhai giving a high five to Sid! "Get Lost you guys! I am going to the room, Pratik Bhai I will forgive you for your comment if you let me share your packet of Milds tonight" Said Lijjo after walking a safe distance from the road "Chal Bhag mote!" said Pratik Bhai and threw a stone aiming at Lijjo! In no time it felt as if every one had went into their rooms leaving just Sid alone sitting at Katta. As he lighted up his cigg, he felt something strange, Something strange about Roxane, how she was different from the rest of the girls, a tom boy, nerd, yet sweet, that swirling of tongue act of hers had been registered in his mind. He saw that same clip again and again in his mind as if it was playing in a loop.

"I got to ask her out" said Sid and started walking... 

Zindagi ki Talaash Mein

Jab sasien tham si jati hai
Kyu yeh khamoshi satati hai?
Bhed se tej chalne ki chah mein
Yeh zindagi kyu rulati hai?

Sab se aage chalne ki daud mein
Apno ka saath chuth sa jata hai
Phir jeet ke bhi saali
Yeh tanhai kyu satati hai?

Apne mansube pure karne ki khatir
Apno ko hi andekha kardiya
Apne maksad pure karne ke bad
Sali yeh zindagi hi rulati hai

Shor ke saath jeene ki
Adat si ho gayi hai
Raat mein bhi jaagne ki
Yun zaroorat si ho gai hai

Akele baithke sitaro ko dekhna
Yun jagmagate sitaro mein
Apne betiwe kal ko khojna
Ab toh adaat si ho gayi hai

Kal ki baaton mein jeena
Akhir yeh bhi koi jeena hai
Ujde sapon ko sabdo ki sahi se
Likh kar jala dena hi nasihat hai

Zindagi ki murade puri karna
Yeh bhi ek ulfat hai
Haat aya yeh waqt gawa dena
Yeh bhi ek busdili hai

Apne hi haaton se apni kismat ka
Gala ghot dena
Yeh bhi koi fitrat hai?

Apne hi khayalo mein
ghum sa ho jana
Ankahi woh baato ko
Zuban pe lana

Zindagi se dur jani ki
Wajah khojna
Aur aansu ke boondh ko
Girne na dena

Yeh bhi koi zindagi hai?

I'll be there for you - No Matter What!

I'll be there for you
No matter what happens
No matter how difficult the times are
I'll be there for you

To reassure you, to hold your hands
I'll be there for you
To guide you, to nurture you
I'll be there for you

When you get tired with days work
I'll be there to  cherish you

To bring back that smile when you feel low
I'll be there to give you a helping hand for everything

When you crib & give up
I'll be there to push you to reach that extra mile

When you feel tired & are about to doze off
I'll be there to carry you to the bedroom

I'll be there when you feel cold in winters
 to cover you with the quilt

I'll be there clapping for you when you succeed
& I'll be there to hug you when you fail 2 make it & work out a new way

I'll be there for you Honey Always
No matter What!

The Mysterious Women I Met Last Night

It was a lonely night that day, dark and calm. I was mind fucked with all the work at office, things were pestering my mind and I wanted peace desperately. So I sat down in the balcony staring the amazing full moon shadowed by the dark clouds passing around it. There was something mysterious about that night, the hollowness in the air and weather seemed more chilled than usual nights. I prepared myself a large drink of Jack Daniels and sat on the reclining chair. After few sips I made a joint for myself. I prefer smoking up weed at nights it kinds of chills me out with the enlightening smoke that I release. I took a long drag looked up in the sky and let it out with all my worries of the day to relax. In few minutes I could feel the temperature dropping, the ice cubes were still intact in the drink and it tasted rather more smooth this time. I always preferred having my drinks on the rocks. 

I finished my drink bottoms up, I still felt the thirst of fetching myself one more extra large drink and went inside my apartment. As I was walking towards the my bar, I felt someones presence. I turned around but no one was there. I thought may be its the weed working up on me. I prepared myself one more drink and walked towards my balcony again sipping a little. Before I could reach the balcony I saw a woman dressed in black standing in my living room. I gasped wondering where the hell she came from. She stood there like a mannequin staring at me. She had this amazing silky long hair all the way till her shoulders, a locket hanging in neck going all the way down her cleavage. Her figure unnaturally the perfect one I saw till date. I kept looking at her for a while. I did not realize but I don't know why I started walking towards her. There was something mysterious in those eyes. Those eyes dint seemed normal but at the same time seemed very erotic. I reached close to her. "Who are you?" is all I could ask her. She smiled and gazed her glances over me brought her hands near me and ran them on my hair and messed them up. I asked again "How did you come here?". She dint spoke anything she instead chose to run her fingers down from my head to my face running them gently down my chest. Her cold hands had a seducing touch. I felt shivers running over my spine with the touch. She then took away the glass from my hands and walked across the room. Placed the glass on the study table and sat on it extending her legs on the chair. I stood there just watching her unable to utter a single word. Then she invited me close to her by pointing her fingers towards me. I don't know how but I started walking towards this strange beauty. I reached there and glanced at her. She was wearing those leather boots with high heels which adorned her sexy legs. The moment I reached near the chair placed in front of the study table she pushed aside the table with her feet. And I don't know why I advanced few more steps towards her; right in front of her. She took the glass in her hands and offered me to drink it without saying a word. I gulped the entire drink in one go. 

I looked at her and I felt my thirst was still rising but this time it was not for the drink. This time it was the lust in me that was thirsty. She stood up, there was distance less then an ounce between us. She ran her hands on my chest circling it over my shirt and in one go ripped it off. I didn't knew what to do this wasn't the first time I  was with the woman. I had some amazing times with lots of women but she was indeed special and something was unknowingly strange in her that made me so stiff that I didn't know what to do. I stood their like her slave when she started running her soft cold hands on my bare chest. I could feel her breath hitting on my skin. Those lustful eyes had hypnotized me and those soft tender lips were so inviting that I forgot about all my worries and felt her lips on my chest. She looked up at me and those mesmerizing eyes had bowled me over. I felt like her slave and wanting to me please my master. Waiting for her next instruction like her own puppy. She held my hands and took me towards my bedroom. Once in there she pushed me on the bed and kept her boots on my thighs. She then slowly lowered the zipper of her black jacket which went unnoticed so far by me. She wasn't wearing anything inside. She stood her topless and I adorned her amazing silky hair covering her assets. Her navel looked so sexy on that flat stomach. 

The next day when I woke up I found myself on my bed as if nothing happened. I went across the house looking for that mysterious women but couldn't find her. I reassured myself it was a bad dream or may be the weed kicked in too much. I saw the time I was running late for office. I went in the shower, enjoyed the warm water on my skin but I was not able to remove her from my mind. When I stood in front of the mirror I noticed these two marks on my neck similar to a snake bite. But Snakes don't have such big mouths since the distance between the two points were much bigger. A cold fear gripped me inside my body. Was it not a dream??? I felt this urge of drinking something... what was it? I had water, even smoked a joint early in the morning, gulped the entire bottle of JD but nothing worked. I took the knife and slit my hands and sucked it. 

O yeah! I feel the urge of drinking blood. But now I need YOUR blood. 

Shes a Weirdo - Part 4

“Hey Ms Einstein what’s up with you are following me?” Sid said pointing at her as she was walking towards him. “Excuse me, I am here to browse my section of books, why would I follow you?” saying that she passed by him directly to her books section. “That was a bad line” Sid told himself. Thinking how to start the conversation with this weirdo, he headed towards her. She turned back and asked him “Now who’s following whom?” Sid got muffled with her answer thinking about the answer he started “Well, I was asking about how your submission was?” suddenly her face enlightened and there seemed to be a glow on her face. "It was good, mam was happy!" she said all excited. Even before he could say anything there came one of her class mate "there you are, we thought you got lost somewhere, chal everyone is waiting." she grabbed her hand dragged her to their table in the library. Sid just stood there yet again cursing himself for missing one more opportunity to ask her name. He just turned around to see if she was even looking at him. Sheer disappointment she was already lost in her Biotech studies. 

What a nerd yaar, yeh kaisi ladki hai? She only talks to me if I talk about studies! Bhagwaan why did you made such weirdo's! Sid was thinking while glimpsing at her table which reflected on the glass of the cabinet he was facing, His cell phone beeped.... before he could read it Ms Dave shouted from her Seat "Cell Phones on Silent, Else I will take them in my custody". "Yeah! Right, try doing that!" Sid murmured to himself. It was Lijo, "Dude cum 2 kata fast, hav 2 share a brkng news wid u". Keeping the book back in the rack Sid headed to the Katta. "Anna 1 Milds aur 1 cutting chai pani kam - ab bol" said Sid pulling the broken plastic chair which had no back rest and armrest. Lijo was drinking water from the water jugs kept around the place he gargled and spat on the road. "eew! Abe sale yeh kya kar raha hai... have you forgotten all your American Manners!" Lijo smiled and said, "Dude I just saw couple of people doing this, and found it cool in States I could have never dared to do something like this, but here I feel more like an Indian!" Chotu served two cutting chai's on the table while Lijo came and pulled a chair in front of Sid. "Ho gaya tera Indo American Philosophy? But trust me if any girl from campus sees you doing this Chindigiri you will mess up your chances of dating any." Lijo's  felt as if some one had hit him hard on his balls. "Okay! Won't repeat it ever again, I messaged you to tell the inside news the Freshers Party will be held in couple of days, the theme is PROM night." Lijo said smiling sheepishly. "Must be your Idea, PROM nights are only seen in Hollywood movies, in India people are not cool enough to find a partner, besides the girl boy ratio is always an issue." Sid said inhaling his Milds. "Exactly, so we're are setting a new trend, besides all this there are plenty of girls in the Bio tech class to balance it out, take my advice start hunting for a partner right away!"

Before Lijo could finish off his chai, Sid got up and started walking to campus,"Hey where are you going?" Lijo asked unable to understand what happened to Sid suddenly. "Going after my prey, pay Anna on my end, will you?" saying this Sid threw his remaining Milds and popped out some Tic Tac in his mouth. While Lijo ordered another Chai. Before Sid could enter the campus gate he saw her exiting the campus and walking out on the road. "Hey, there you are!" shouted Sid from a distance, she turned around, looking little shocked "And, tell me you aren't following me Mr." she said while Sid approached him. "Siddharth, everyone calls me Sid" saying that he extended his hands smiling thinking Wow its finally happening I will get to know her name! She too extended her hands and they had a handshake in the middle of the street right outside the college campus. "I am Roxane" she said smiling just for the sake of it. "Are you a christian ?" Sid asked walking along with her. "Nopes, I am a Parsi." Sid gave a look which meant Oh I see! "Well you are the first Parsi girl I have met in my life." Sid said rather feeling happy. "Certainly there are just few close to a lac in India." she said showing her teeth. "Hmm, so you done with your library session today? Going back home?" Sid asked to plan his journey with her. "Yaar, I am hungry wanna munch some Burger wanna join me at Moginis" she asked him. "Why not!" So they entered the Moginis outlet next to the campus. "Bhaiya ek chicken burger dena, what will you have Siddharth?" she asked him while taking out her wallet from her bag. "I just now told you to call me Sid, why you calling me Siddharth, Sid is so short and sweet!" Sid took the conversation to other extreme. "Well, whatever dude, it takes me time to get used to names!" she said settling on the bar stool in the shop. "That's the reason its a small nick name for maximum recall." Sid said laughing. "Very Funny! Now will you order or are you just going to watch me eating my burger" she said taking her burger from the platform. "Hmm, I will have one Black-forest Pastry" paying him a hundred rupee note he settled down. "Sir Chutta nahi hai!" said the shopkeeper giving back him the note. Sid glanced his wallet there were just two notes of 100. He thought of going to Anna and getting the change but how could he leave Roxane alone that time. "Here" Roxane said giving the change to the Shopkeeper. "Now I owe you this Pastry, so at least I can offer you a bite" said Sid offering her the pastry with a new spoon. She took a bite and enjoyed the taste. "There's a little cream left out there" Sid said pointing his finger near her mouth. She just swirled her tongue around the mouth and licked it. "That was pretty Weird!" Sid said. "What?!!! You want me to wipe it off with a paper napkin, why waste paper!"

Now what will happen next ??? Will Sid ask her for the Party? stay tuned :) post your comments

Shes a Weirdo - Part 3

"Oh, Its you I thought it’s someone teasing me" she said looking head up. Few hair strands had shadowed her face; she gently pushed them aside and looked at Sid who still seemed not convinced with her story. "I said sorry yaar! Look I have to complete this journal before 11 a.m." she said and continued doing her work. "Hmm, I thought you were done with your studying when I saw you leaving college last night at 9 pm" Sid said sipping his hot coffee. "Oh, I dint knew you management students keep such close watch on girls!" she fired back at him. "Well, I was getting back to college and saw you leaving the gate that's it!" Sid made his point clear. "Oh so what were you doing in college so late? I don't think you came to visit the Library!" she said drawing some weird looking diagram. "For your information I stay up here in the Hostel, so I was just returning to my room." Sid said which looked very convincing. "Well, I got bored in Library, went home and ended up watching a movie with my roommates." she said drawing and erasing the diagram in her journal. "Oh movies, I hope you didn’t saw anything on Application of Biotechnology" said Sid sipping the last few drops of his coffee. "Shut up Dude! I don't think of studying 24/7 I saw Catch me if you can! It’s a classic" she said filling in few details under the diagram. "Girls watching a classic movie of Tom Hanks. Pretty Weird! “Said Sid taking a close look at the diagram she was making.”Whatever, look I need to complete this, oh my god it’s already 10.50 a.m." she said looking at her watch. “By the way what are you making?” asked Sid playing with the pencil. “It’s a diagram showing metabolism of a human cell.” She explained pointing her finger at the diagram. “Hmmm, it went like a complete bouncer to me” said Sid looking at her. “I got to rush now, see you later!” she said snatching the pencil from Sid’s hands. “Hang on a second, what’s your…” before Sid could say anything she left the canteen running towards her class on the floor above.

“Freak! Man what was I doing for over half an hour I should have at least asked her name” Sid said to himself and hitting on his own head. “Oh, there he is.” Ankit said walking towards the canteen pointing his fingers at Sid. “Kya Boss, Kidar tha tu? Pankaj Sir was asking about you?” Ankit said keeping his bag on the canteen table. “Acha, what was he asking?” Sid said looking at Ankit. “Yahi, ki janab kidar hai, College mein rehkar bhi class nahi ate and all that; Fanta piyega?” Ankit said taking out his wallet from his jeans. Ankit Tiwari was Sid’s classmate. He was a shrewd student, always went in a lot of details especially during presentations. He would ask a lot of questions just to clear his doubts; which used to pop up every 5 minutes in a lecture. Unanimously everyone had kept his name Bimari instead of Tiwari. “Nahi yaar, I just had coffee, by the way have you seen Lijo?” asked Sid, getting up from the chair. “Hmmm, I guess he must have gone down for a smoke. Dude come back by 11.30 we have Revti mam’s lecture.” Instructed Ankit winking at Sid. “Sure, dude I’ll catch you there.” Walking down from 1^st floor where the canteen was situated Sid headed straight to the faculty room which was on ground floor. He headed straight to Pankaj sir’s cubicle. Pankaj was a professor from North India – some place near Patna. He used to teach International Business to students, his funda was simple download the presentations from Google and show them in the class. “Dekhlo, let me know when you are done reading it, I’ll change the slide and if you have any doubt meet me after the lecture” this was his patent line in every lecture.

“Excuse me Sir, Can I speak to you for a while?” enquired Sid tapping at Pankaj Sir’s cubicle. “Aao Sid, Kaha the aaj? Betho Betho, bhai chai wai peoge?” said Pankaj offering him the chair. “Nahi sir, thank you for asking. Sir, last night I was working on the presentation of Revti mam that’s why sone mein late ho gaya, you know na sir hostel mein koi sone hi nahi deta.” Said Sid trying his best to convince Pankaj. “Sir, aaj ki presentation ap please mail kardenge, I’ll study it thoroughly.” “Okay, don’t worry you are a bright student I will do my best!” Pankaj reassured Sid. In his heart Sid knew that Pankaj will never mail him anything because he was too lazy to do anything in fact if Sid himself would search Google he might be able to download the presentation. “Thank you sir” saying that he left the faculty room. “Kidar hai yaar?” Sid called up Lijo. “Katte pe jaldi aa… Revti ka lecture hai baad mein!” Lijo said within few minutes Sid reached the Katta. “Chotu, 1 cream roll aur ek cutting dena; aur Anna ek Milds.” Sid said reaching the Katta. “Dude, Pankaj was...” before Lijo could say anything Sid shot back “I know man, I met him 2 minutes back gave him some Goli.”

“I can’t wait to see my Revti today; I heard she is wearing a Black dress today!” Lijo said sharing the ciggie from Sid. “Abe sale, she’s our faculty usko toh chod de” Sid said smiling. “Chod de! Dude, she’s the reason why I took management, else you know I would have taken Hotel Management.” Lijo said passing the ciggie back to Sid. “I know man, you are also one of the Deewana of Revti just like Bimari” Sid said exhaling his smoke. “Abe yaar, who are you comparing me with, that Chu Bimari, he is a nerd man! What does he knows about women, sex, kamasutra Lijo said munching the cream roll which Sid had ordered. “Yeah, we Indians don’t know much about Kamasutra despite being from this very land and you Desi Videshi bowys know hell lots!” said Sid sarcastically. “It’s because you Indians haven’t opened your minds like we people in the west have done, you are still a virgin while I lost my virginity when I was just 15 yrs old forget all this; till date I haven’t seen a girl in a Bikini in any of the Mumbai Beaches! Grow up you Indians!” Lijo shot back with his Guru Gyan. “Fuck you asshole, you are a lusty animal who fantasizes about his own faculty day in day out” Sid said sipping his tea. “Dude, don’t tell me you never check her out, man whenever she turns around to write on the board, tell me you haven’t heard the chuckles in the classroom, her tight pants and bulging ass are so inviting! I wonder if she might be interested in dating me, she might not be more than 3-4 years elder to us, don’t you think?” asked Lijo and got lost again dreaming about her. In the mean time Sid finished his tea. “Chal, let’s go else your darling mam won’t let us in!” saying that Sid threw his ciggie and popped in few mints.

“Can we come in mam” said Lijo standing by the door leaning half inside the classroom. “Come in Lijo, okay class today we will solve a case study based on the principles of Management.” She said writing Case Study on the board and inserting her pen drive in the computer. Lijo looked at Sid and smiled reminding him about the his talks at the Katta pointing at the whiteboard. “Hey, these Biotech lectures get over by what time?” asked Sid to Bimari who was sitting next to him. “Hmmm I guess may be by 1 p.m.” said Bimari looking suspiciously at Sid. The lecture passed by with everyone solving the case study while Bimari and Lijo eyeing Revti mam and lusting about her in their minds. “Hey dude, I’ll be sleeping after the lunch what’s your plan?” asked Lijo. “Nothing man, I am planning to hit the library, I would prefer a nap there in the Air Conditioners.” Said Sid winking at Lijo. They both went to canteen had their lunch, while Lijo went towards the hostel Sid headed towards the Library.

It was almost 1.30 pm Sid was hoping to see Ms Einstein in the Library. “Today I have to ask her name and get her contact number, I don’t know why but there is something about her that I want to spend more and more time with her” Sid spoke to himself in his mind while heading towards the library. “Ahh, there she is but what are so many other girls doing with her!” Sid spoke to himself once again as he saw her sitting with her classmates doing an assignment.  He headed directly to get his romantic book in the browsing section, while he was searching for a book, she came by too.

Now wait for the 4^th part please post your comments here or on the facebook page. 

Shes a Weirdo - Part 2

After having his dinner Sid went to his room - Hostel was one such place which would come alive late in the evening. Room no 507 was the heart of the Hostel, not because Sid stayed in it but because Pratik, Lijo and Vinit stayed with him. Vinit had a passion for music and was a good guitarist every night they would booze and smoke up and play the anthem Sutta Na Mila which would echo in the whole campus. Their warden retired ex army man Subedar Pratap Singh was a puppet of their hands. Whenever he would get in his room in the evening after dinner they would lock his room from the outside and throw away the keys. Poor chap would call up the canteen fellow and they used to break the lock with a crowbar and let him out. Once Pratap singh lost his cool and made everyone parade in the corridor on their knees. The next evening someone trapped him again this time with a big bass lock. The canteen fellows had to bring in a key vendor from the town side late in the evening to free him. Pratap Singh din't had the balls to report this to the management. If he had done it he would have lost his job. This is just an example of the unity among hostelers - no one ever spoke about who was the culprit who would lock him up everyday. Sid knew it was Lijo who hated Pratap Singh to the core. Pratap Singh soon understood that he needs to give freedom to the hostelers only then he could scout free in the evening. Cease fire took place last month when he invited everyone to his room especially Vinit and offered him Royal Stag. That night celebrations took place from Sutta na Mila, GMD, Papa Kehte hai, all the songs were sung in chorus including Pratap Singing Mera Juta Hai Japani.

Lijo was their Desi Videsi bowy! Born and brought up in New York, Lijo arrived in India few months back. His family had to settle in India after his brother did some big Jhol and eloped to India. Lijo was their punching bag, everyone would crack jokes on the poor guy and make fun of him. While Pratik was the Bhai of the Hostel, he would scare off everyone including the security guards not to mention the Kadak Pratap Singh too was scared of him. Rumors were that he had affiliations with Chota Rajan Gang and few police records too. Everyone used to wtonder how he got admission in the college. He was almost 5 years elder his masculine body scared off everyone and that's why the word Bhai was synonymous to Pratik. Being his roommate Sid had an advantage no one had the daring to mess around with any of Pratik Bhai's roomie.

Sid entered the room and saw Lijo sitting in his USA flag print Bermuda pants. "Hey dude you still haven't come out of your USA hangover?" asked Sid falling off on his bed. "Dude, what do you want me to do? Wear the Indian Langoti?" asked Lijo back to Sid. "C'mon Sid, give him some space, his big ass will look much more bigger in those langotis!" commented Vinit tuning his guitar. "Abe sale, Mota kisko bola tu?" Lijo stood up almost ready to fight. "Abe Mote, Tujhe bola! Sale yaad rakh agar Aaj raat tune zara bhi gas chodi toh tujhe yaha se neeche pekhdunga" Shouted Pratik seating near the window rolling his joint. Lijo got his answer and didn't said a word after that. Sid was so far mum, he pulled out his I-pod and tuned into his favorite numbers. Few minutes later he felt Lijo waking him up, "Dude you got any ciggies?". "Yeah hang on" Sid slid his hand under his bed and brought out his packet of Milds and offered one ciggie to Lijo. "Thanks man, I wonder who took away my packet it was just kept here moments ago" said Lijo lighting his ciggie. "Fuck Chote" they both shouted in a friction of second, "that ass hole, he has messed with the wrong guys this time." said Sid. "I have a plan to teach him a lesson." said Sid finding his match box. He then took out few match sticks and removed the explosive material from the tip and kept them on the table. While Lijo kept watching, he took out all the ciggies from the pack and kept them in his drawer. "This will give him a smoky experience for sure." saying that Sid removed a little tobacco from the ciggie and pushed those little explosives inside the ciggie and with the use of the pen he pushed it further inside. "Done" Sid had the evil look which revealed someone' gonna get hurt tonight. "Man, this is a brilliant Idea" exclaimed Lijo. Together they walked to room no 510 where Sudesh alias Chote the 5 feet shorty was boozing with friends; kept aside was Lijo's Milds packet. Reaching there Lijo picked up the packet without letting them know, "Fuck assholes, there isn't anything left in it." Lijo said looking at Sid. "Quick get one ciggi from my drawer and put it in this packet, here" Lijo took the packet with him and went to the room while Sid kept his hand on Chote's shoulder and said "Kya Chote Bhai akele akele, Humein nahi pilaoge?". Chote looked baffled, he thought may be these guys found out about the ciggi thing but the look on Sid's face reassured him all is well. 

"Yaar, abhi sirf ek quarter hi bacha hai aur ciggi bhi khatam ho gayi hai." Chote said while his roomies tried to hide the other bottles kept around the room under the bed. "Koi nahi yaar, ek peg nahi toh ek sip hi sahi, uskeliye toh mana nahi karega na?" saying that Sid voluntarily took his glass in hand in the mean time Lijo too joined in and took Akash, his roommates glass. "Cheers" they both shouted. Lijo did a bottoms up - that irked Chote to the core. "Are Chote naraz kyu hota hai, yeh le sutta pi" and offered him the pack. "Asshole, you got a pack with you and you dint even told me!" saying that Sid snatched the pack from his hand. He examined the ciggi and took the fresh one in his hands, before Lijo could act to take the last one, Chote pounced on the last one. Sid took the lighter kept around and lighted his ciggie so did Chote. Quickly Lijo started recording on his cell phone, "Chote Kuch Dev D style se Sutta khech" said Lijo winking at Sid. The moment he dragged the breath in from the ciggi the explosives kept in the ciggie caught fire and light up which scared the hell out of Chote. He shouted on top of his voice and threw away the ciggie in shock. "Fuck Man! What was that?" asked Sid looking at Lijo who was rolling on the bed laughing so were the rest of the people in the room. "Salo,#@#)&#)@$^ Kamino, Teri Maa ki!!!" screamed Chote, "Abe oye, Gand mein dum ho toh next time ciggi dhap ke batana, Chal Lijo!" By the time they reached their room that clip had reached the entire hostel via blue tooth. Later in the night Vinit played some soft romantic numbers, while Lijo and Sid played counter strike on their laptops. Finally Sid dozed off at 4 am in the morning, 

"Abe Uth Sale! Pankaj ka lecture hai" Lijo kept screaming at Sid while he was awaiting near the bathroom for Pratik bhai to come out. "Pratik Bhai thoda jaldi karo na... pressure aa raha hai!" Lijo said trying to adjust his ass on the chair kept near the bathroom. "Abe mote, rukh ja sada mat andar tak bas aa rahi hai" saying that Pratik bhai opened the door and came outside soon Lijo ran inside the bathroom. Lijo come out and rushed for the lecture while Sid was still asleep, he finally woke up around 10 am got ready and reached canteen around 10.30 am. Ordered sandwich and coffee and sat in the canteen reading the newspaper. The moment he kept his paper down he saw her - Ms  Einstein. She was still sitting with few book around her copying something in her journal. He took his coffee in his hands and went over next to her and sat. She din't even noticed him. "My God, you Bio tech girls study so much" said Sid but not looking at her. "Fuck off" came a voice just then. Sid looked at her she was still writing and said "excuse me ms Einstein!" 

3rd part will be posted soon! 

Shes a Weirdo Part 1

It was the month of October when Siddharth met Roxane for the first time in the college library. They had been in the same college over few months but never encountered each other. Siddharth had enrolled for Bachelor in Business Administration while Roxane had enrolled for Bachelor in Bio Tech. Weird combination of subjects of the two. Siddharth was a fun loving guy, stayed in college hostel while Roxane stayed in a rented flat around with couple of other girls from her class. Sid was not a bright student but people always thought he was very studious he tried his best to stay updated with the management lessons taught in the classroom but post lunch he used to spend time in college library. One of the very reason he preferred being in the library was because of the 18 air conditioners in the library that made it the most chilled out zone in the entire campus. He was browsing some romantic books in the art section which was adjacent to the Bio Section. The browsing section of the library looked more like a shopping centre aisle, with 6 feet of cabinets of books on the either side it looked pretty scary - at least to Sid! 

He was taking a right turn that's when he felt something weird incoming, someone was walking with at least 10-12 books and that too all piled up one over the other. He couldn't even see who was it, before he could realise that person bumped into him and lost all the balance and books fell down in a fraction of a second. "Oh Fuck!" came a voice - the voice was sweet and an amazing accent! He saw a girl in red top with a mickey mouse print and dark blue jeans, hair tied up in a pony style. "here let me help you!" said Sid as he bent down to pick up some books. Looking at the books he read the tittle " Biotechnology : Applying the genetic revolution", he scrolled the last page of the book to read the page no. it was 758. "Do you spend your nights also in the library?" asked Sid to the girl who was too busy picking up the books. "Excuse Me!" she said for the first time looking in his eyes, of all the girls Sid had seen in the college she was different. But what was the difference he couldn't recognize that time. "I mean look at all these books, I guess the one I picked up is the smallest among all you are carrying! Do you read them all? I don't think you can issue all of them for home" said Sid defending himself at the same trying not to look rude to the girl. 

Sid never spoke to people much in the library - on the contrary he followed the rules of the library - to maintain Silence. The librarian was the biggest example of rules breaker - she would spend most of her time chit chatting on the phone extension. Her voice would echo most of the times. While Library was the best Kuchi Ku spot of the college, all the couples would hit library post lectures. Which could be a better place to hang out? Where you don't have to spend for the Air Conditioner, pay for expensive coffees, or fiddle with chairs to sit closer. Sid would spend time observing the couples and how they did the Chance Pe Dance under the table. He used to feel amused with these actions of his fellow students and used to term them Despos! He would help students who were new to the reading culture, he loved reading but restricted himself to the self learning books and romantic stories. It was a night mare for him to read Philip Kotler and Stephen Robbins books. 

"Well, I am from Bio tech, and we have to be well informed about the latest Genetic revolutions and how does the world is changing fast and the applications of modern sciences in class room - there are marks for classroom participation you know na?" Said the fair skinned Roxane. "hmm, I know that but I barely understood anything you said about Bio tech." said Sid smiling trying to hide his lack of subject knowledge. "Here hand over few books to me, let me help you so that you don't bump into someone else again" said Sid trying to show some concern and help. "Hmm if you insist, here hold these heavy ones for me" by saying this Roxane handed over some 5 real heavy books to Sid. Sid felt as if he was back to school, carrying the load of workbooks, class books, homework books and textbooks in his school bag these books were of the similar load. Reaching to the corner of the library he kept the books on the table. And just landed on the seat next to Roxane. "God! those are really heavy ones! My god how can you read such heavy books!" said Sid showing some disgust and exhaust. "Well I guess you must be a Commerce Student for sure - since you guys never carried books to college, we Science students always used to spend quality time studying" Roxane said with a straight face - which sounded very mean and outrageous to him. "Hello! What do you mean by Quality time studying - I secured a good 74 percent in my HSC hai Dude! Life mein bahot kuch karna padta hai' she just gave this answer. 

Before he could answer the librarian came there - which was pretty weird since she never left her seat. "You two are talking so much - don't you get it its a Library" she said in a stern voice which looked very new to Sid as all the time she sounded like a comedian laughing on her desk. "Well mam we are discussing Science and Commerce" said Sid trying to justify himself. "I know you are Management Student and Shes a Bio tech... all the Bio tech girls do here is flirt in the Library. I know what you guys are up to" said Ms Dave, who looked very stupid in her dress that day which was a White Kurti with blue and black designs and Orange legging  and flower garland in her hair. That garland was the cause they never required Room Freshener in the library. 

"Excuse me, how can you say I am flirting with him! If that's the case I will go and sit somewhere else" said Roxane in disgust and piled up all the books and left to the other extreme corner of the library. 

Sid and Ms Dave kept looking at each other while Roxane left the seat. "Thank you mam" said Sid to himself thank you for screwing my only chance to interact with a good looking female in the college. Thanks to you I dint even got the opportunity to introduce myself. He kept looking at her for a while then browsed the book he got for himself to read. He kept the book back in the cabinet and made a move out crossing her table just to see if she notices. But all in vain she was so engrossed in reading the stuff. 

He walked outside college to the near by Katta adjacent to the college to have a Cutting Chai and Sutta. There he met one of his classmate. "Hey Dude, What you doing so late in the evening - dint you went home? asked Sid to his classmate Vivek. Vivek was a wanna be of his class he dressed according to the styles in the fashion and wooed the females of the college on his Rx 100 bike which made an irritating noise whenever he would race around the college. "Nothing re dude, I was out with Divya, you know her right? The hot chic from Bio tech - Man I wish we had some sort of these girls in Management!" said Vivek trying to look cool by declaring he was out on a date. "So where did you guys go?" asked Sid lighting his ciggy. "It was a long drive man, we eloped from the canteen bunked the lecture - its a big deal for these Bio chics to bunk the lecture you know! We went to that near by mall, had some lunch at Noodle Bar - Fuck that place is shit expensive! No wonder why she was so happy!" said Vivek trying to show that he isn't making up his own story. "Hmm good for you man! Yeah Indeed these Bio chics are weirdo" sipping his Cutting Chai said Sid. 

Finishing his golden puff - the last puff of the ciggy  he thought about Roxane 'there was something in her that was cool but at the same time weird - she looks cute, shes fair, her hair were silky, she had a cute looking smile - but hang on when did she smiled??? A question popped in his head - Well it would look good to see her smiling. She is one of those scholar types nerds but she definitely doesn't looks like one! I wish we bump once again tomorrow in the library. At least this time I will ask her name... but what if she doesn't comes!!! Yaar - why am I thinking about her - She doesn't even seems my type of girl - Shes a Weirdo! 

Love, Attitude and Happiness lead to Self Awareness

Dear Readers,

Thank you for your continuous support and encouragement. As per your votes on Facebook Questions - here is a story based on your highest votes for Non fiction Life Lessons, since the second highest votes were for a Romantic Story I thought blending some emotions of Love would help in not disappointing those of you who voted for it. This small story will do an interaction with your sub consciousness mind, as you read it answer the questions to yourself which I have addressed to you.

When there is Love, all the attitude changes. There is a big difference in attitude, have you noticed this? Suppose you have a very nice crockery set in your home and if your son or daughter or sibling, somebody very dear to you breaks it, what do you say? 'Oh, never mind, doesn't matter'. But if your servant breaks or somebody whom you dislike breaks it; See, how your attitude varies towards the same thing that has happened. Or your nice new carpet, somebody has spilt tea in it. So if you have done it or somebody very dear has done it, you say ' Oh, it doesn't matter. Ok, anyway happened'. You murmur a little, grumble a little and then stop. But if somebody else has done it your whole attitude towards them is different, isn't it? So when there is love, you are ready to undergo or undertake any strain or discomfort or problem, they don't appear to be very big. Then, tolerance comes in you naturally. If you are determined, your love for something, makes you do anything for what you want.

If you love sight seeing, then you don't mind any discomfort, you go around sight seeing anywhere. If you love adventure, you go for it. Same way, if you love money very much, then you put your whole life earning money. You get ulcers, blood pressure, diabetes and getting all that, in spite of it, you work, work, work and work. What for? Just to have Money!!!

But happiness is something that which expands. Whatever is constricting is not happiness. When you are happy, have you noticed how you feel? the mind expands. Examples of which I have quoted in my previous post love is in the air. At the same time when you are unhappy, what happens? The mind shrinks. So whenever you think "Mine, Mine" - the mind is shrinking. 'My son. my daughter, my boyfriend, my girlfriend, my car, my bike, my room, my laptop, my this my that! - the mind shrinks. Whenever mind shrinks, it is bound to bring unhappiness. And when mind expands it brings joy!

When you go beyond happiness, what happens? The mind expands at the same time is not unconscious. Usually, when you are happy, you become spaced out, you are not focused. When you are unhappy, you are very focused. But there is a beautiful combination of both - you are happy, at the same time alert and focused, that is called Self Awareness. 

The Walk We Had

The glimpse my eyes caught of you,
That evening was certainly special.
The moon was charming in full size,
The clouds were stirring up the sky.

Your fragrance spiced up the night
The moon shined up throwing its light
And I followed your shadow
Together we kept walking for times

The zapping cars made the night so special
Every time a car passed by you
The hairs curled up your face
Making it irresistible for me to take my eyes off you

That stretch we walked near the lake
is still afresh in my mind

who knew that  small walk of ours
would bring the hearts this closer

There seemed to be a magic in the air
when you held my hands in your hands
Seemed like the cupid hit my heart
As I saw you blushing all the time

As the sun dips down in the ocean
I wait for the moon to shine up the skies
Whenever I look up the sky
I can remember our walk
And your face lights up in front of me....

Social Message for all you Bikers this season!!!

The secret of walking on water

Life is an amazing gimmick!

Each one of us would agree that in our Journey of Life we grow with times, the sense of maturity comes with handful of experiences which we remember all our life. You might not remember your first steps you took in your childhood but ask your parents they will tell every little detail of the epic.You might not remember the first time you said Pa or Ma but ask your elders they will tell you since for them these are the memories that life has bestowed upon them. 

What you might remember is how you dived first time in the swimming pool and how scared were you before taking the first step. You might remember peddling your cycle around and falling off. With age we all learn from our mistakes. Mistakes are bound to happen else life would not have been so dramatic. If mistakes were not a part of our lives we would have been just Machines! Mistakes bring the sense of humanity in us. 

In life we come across different kinds of people. Time tells us who will stay with us and who will choose to exit from our lives. People come and go, they all come for a reason. One lesson that life teaches us for sure is to Never Expect - building expectations leads to unhappiness. In our existence in this world we tend to attach a lot of emotions and expectations from everyone and when it does not meets our expectations we feel sad and disheartened. 

Like the product life cycle also has a decline stage - so do we - sometimes feeling low is that stage in our life which leads to depression - loss of interest in activities which seemed fun and interesting sometime back. Like in Corporate we do re-positioning to the product to keep the cycle running in our lives too we have to re-introduce the sense of belonging. Taking life lightly as it comes, ignoring the problems and being solution -oriented to reinforce the spirit of life. 

We come across various difficult times in life when we get clueless about how, why, what to do ? These are the gimmicks of life. All you got to do is Plan for the best and Prepare for the worst - that's the secret of Walking on water - the Journey of our life is like a river flowing - just floating with flow.

So the secret of walking on water is to know where the stones are hidden.   

Wrong Number

Many of us keep wondering on new ways on how to hit on girls – bridging the gap from absolute strangers to friendship and then moving in to become that special someone and then moving away from then again! This is a story of a guy called Shekar Singh, a 23 year old Rajpoot from a small town in Kuchaman from Nagor District in Rajasthan. Shekar, though from a small town is a pure Rajpoot – smart, intelligent, wicked and in Rajasthani style complete Dabang Admi! He came to Mumbai after graduating in BCOM from Symbiosis from the place which that is called the Oxford of East – Pune about two years ago.  In his hostel life away from home he did a lot of chamdigiri though many of his friends thought he was a tharki but he proved them wrong with his elite style of dating some real hot symbi chics.

It was mid July when he met some old friends in Mumbai’s pub on a Friday evening, remembering old times which they used to hang-out at a pub in Pune’s MG Road called Toons. Today they all decided to booze and get talli just like the old days! In the pub his friend Navin cooked up the idea of playing truth and dare. Navin who finally completed his CS (does not means Counter Strike! It means Company Secretary!) is now working full time with a high profile firm in Mumbai though he doesn’t gets to meet Shekar that often as Shekar too is busy with his KPO work after moving down from Pune’s Magarpatta Infotech Park.

The idea of Truth and Dare is welcomed by Girish and Ajay too; the duo had a love-hate relationship with Shekar as they always envied him for stealing the hottest looking girl under their sleeves for bike rides. They both now were working with a PR Agency and Events company.  As the beer started pouring in their mugs, kababs and sizzlers were orderd and in few minutes the pitchers started getting empty – they all seemed getting into the right mood of the perfect reunion! As the empty bottle of a pint revolved the table and pointed at Shekar – Ajay declared “no one is asking this bastard any questions because we all know he will never tell the truth; instead let me give this Playboy a real dare – a dare he will never be able to achieve.”

“Acha Bidu – yeh baat hai – toh lagi shart” said Shekar rolling up his sleeves showing his eagerness to turn the dare into a bet. “So here it is” – Ajay popped out his cell phone and selected few random names of girls – “This is Sheena – her number is 96192****, if you get her to meet you in person I will bow down to you” said Ajay in one go then going for the bottoms up instantly.

“Hmmm – any details you wanna give me about this chic – I hope she looks hot besides she has the heart like you – wicked! You know I like theeki mirchis!” saying this Shekar gulped the entire mug of beer and waved the waiter to repeat the order. “ Chote now tell me something- just bowing down to me wont help – this isn’t a dare which can be fulfilled here in the pub itself this thing will take atleast 2 days lets meet on Sunday here itself and I’ll get the chic and you pay the bill – ab bol lagata hai shart? “

Ajay got a mixed feeling inside him one point of time he was confident but now something in him was telling him this is going little far off – because deep down he knew the real playboy of Shekar was still alive and he still had the instinct in him to get girls! But the beer kicked in and he stood up and said “Navin and Girish are witness to this epic in making bet if you lose then you the looser will have to pay for the all expense trip to Pune next weekend which includes booze, babes and hotel stay!”

“Done” said Shekar “Now tell me more about this chic will you or you want me to find it out myself.” Saying this Shekar winked at the other two sitting stunned out there wondering where is this game heading to. “Sheena is a marketing executive of an Airlines Company – she is smart, sexy I mean real sexy – she looks dam hot in those trousers and blazer – she stays around Carter Road real uptown girl and very hard to get to. She has the perfect body and Attitude which is very annoying! So what do you think – can you handle it?”

“Looks like he forgot the good old Symbi days” Said Shekar waving the waiter for the last order. In the mean time Navin and Girish got caught up in a conversation while Ajay eyed his drink – a sign of his that he is Talli now! Shekar saw the time in his watch it was 1.45 am he popped his cell phone out and created a new message and started typing “Hey Aditya – I have reached Mumbai International Airport, come down to pick me up I am waiting for you regards Shekar” and sent it Sheena.

By the time they paid the bill chipping in their contribution – Shekar sent one more message to her “Dude please come fast I am waiting here in the waiting lounge – dam tired come soon!” he dint got any reply that night. This is gona be a little tough he thought to himself – Next day being a Saturday he woke up and called up Sheena “Abe Sale kidar that tu raat bhar I am still here at the airport waiting for you??” he said without even letting her speak “Excuse me” came the voice from the other end “Hi could you please hand over the phone to Adi – this is Shekar here” said Shekar lighting his cigarette and smiling candidly to himself “Who Shekar? This is Sheena Here - I am sorry I guess you have dialled a wrong number!”  Came the voice which seemed she said this with a straight face. “Hello! Miss if you knew this is a wrong number – I am sure you could replied last night itself to the messages I had sent on this number – atleast I could have moved out from this filthy place to a better place!” said Shekar with a rather stern voice showing some discomfort. “Look Shekar honestly speaking I guess there has been some misunderstanding with your number – I know the place is very disgusting to stay overnight but honestly I don’t give a damn to any random sms or calls from strangers!” “I guess this is how life welcomes one in Mumbai! Thanks a lot Sheena” “Hello – Listen I said Sorry to you – there’s nothing more that I can do!” Shekar was happy to see that the conversation was growing in the right direction. “Its okay Sheena I appreciate your apology but I guess I will have to move out from here now and think where I should head – thanks for taking the call atleast!” “No Problem – and hey Shekar you can try some hotel around, there are plenty out there” “Thanks dear! Have a good day!”

Wow! This went much better than expected – she isn’t that bad after all may be she behaved with Ajay different because of his Tharki eyes! Shekar spent the rest of the day at his place doing the usual chores – hanging out with friends later in the evening. He convinced one of his friends Ravi to call up Aditya (Sheena) and inform him oops her to come for a party on Sunday. So Ravi calls her up from his cellphone “Hi Adi – this is Harsh here” “Hello this isn’t Aditya’s number whos dis?” “Oh Sorry – hi this is Harsh – could you please inform Adi that its Shekar’s Birthday tomorrow and he is in town after 5 long years and there’s a party at Fire & Ice”  said Harsh smiling at Shekar giving a thumbs up sign. “I guess you have dialled a wrong number this is Sheena here” “Oh, I am sorry actually I was just calling up all the people in his friends list on his cell phone, sorry to bother you mam.”

“So buddy do you think this will work?” asked Ravi looking up at Shekar “I don’t know man! I have heard she looks smoking hot and somewhere I have a gut feel she will come.” In the evening he went the usual Saturday night clubbing with Harsh. The next day around 11 am he called up Sheena “Hi Sheena – Shekar here I am very sorry to bother you at this point of the time!” “Hey what’s wrong with you dude? Why you and your friends are calling me again and again!” she had a little disgust in her voice but somewhere even she seemed to have got smitten away by the manly voice of Shekar. “Look Sheena I am very sorry for all the trouble caused to you – actually I was not aware what my friends were upto I just got the news from Harsh right now so I thought I better apologise to you and don’t worry I will delete your number right away to avoid any confusions here after” said Shekar with innocence in his voice. “That’s okay I can understand Harsh sounded bit too excited yesterday anyways wish you a very happy birthday” said Sheena not at all sounding like a stranger but more like an old time buddy. “So Sheena I know this might sound strange to you – but I guess this is the only way I can make up to you it’s your choice – I would like to invite you for the party at Fire & Ice today at 7 pm you may get along your friends too” said Shekar with his fingers crossed.

“Hmm well even though I don’t have any plans tonight but the idea of meeting a complete stranger is a bit strange don’t you think Shekar?” She sounded as if she is really interested in flirting – wow this is cool said shekar to himself! “Well honestly speaking – I am actually delighted to have this conversation with you right now – who knew that the night I would land up in Mumbai and call up a wrong number and getting birthday wishes from the same female on my birthday – don’t you think you could make this birthday party of mine more memorable by coming tonight!” Shekar was now confident that she’s in!

“Okay Shekar! Before I tell you my answer do me a favour will you?” asked Sheena. “What?” asked Shekar puzzled. “No need to delete my number instead save it as Sheena Kapoor and I will see you at 7 pm with couple of my friends!” she too seemed excited. “And remember Shekar this isn’t a blind date it’s just a party your birthday party!” they both laughed. “Sure dear see you then” Shekar smiled historically at his wicked mind and patting himself.

“Oye motu! Be there today at Fire & Ice and don’t forget to get me a birthday cake it’s after all my birthday today!” Shekar said to Ajay. “Your Birthday! What are you talking about?”

“Boss she is coming tonight with some of her friends – bhul gaya bet?” you better show up today else I will cut off your balls! After ab jake laga hai right number not a Wrong Number!”